Tips for Online Daters

If you haven’t been on a date for sometime then things may have changed.  Obviously you have figured out how to use the online dating services that are out there.  You may have already had some nice chats with this person over the internet too.  When it comes to face to face though you may be feeling a little bit rusty.  Here are some helpful tips that might help you make it through date one and on to date two.

Thinking of topics to talk about can be difficult.  The best things to talk about are the topics that you are knowledgeable in and that most people would find interesting.  If you are telling stories about your Aunt Linda then they probably will lose interest very quickly.  You can save those stories for date six.  Currently on date one, maybe you should talk about your favorite football team or your favorite food.

Remember to always paint yourself in a positive light.  Don’t tell any stories about how terrible you have been at something or how you feel that you are a complete failure at life.  That’s kind of depressing and no one is going to want to sit through these stories all night.  Just keep the conversations happy and fun and you should be able to have a good time.

Be the first to comment - What do you think?  Posted by admin - December 22, 2010 at 7:32 pm

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Traumatic Love Life

From the very first kiss, we are creating a pattern or behavior if you will, of how all our future relationships will manifest and play out.  Now, if you have made mistakes in your past with relationships, I hope that you have been able to change your behaviors and start making the good decisions.  Until you understand that you want to find someone that is deserving of your love, then you might not have the right mindset for what you want, just yet.

In the beginning, with our first crush, first love and first real relationship, our feelings are very intense.  Those very strong feelings are driven by hormones, anxiety and adrenaline.  A terrible combination if you want to think straight.  With all of that going on, then you also have all kinds of other psychological issues to add into the mix.  There are a number of factors that determine the type of person that we seek for instance.

If you have ever heard that girls look for guys that are like their dad; well that is true.  Generally, it works the same way for guys, except they either want someone like their mother or someone completely different.  The point is, those chemicals will finally subside and you will be able to think a lot more clearly, but some of the feelings will remain and be triggered by visual and biochemical responses that lead you right back to the type of person that you were with the first time.

It would be great if that first person was the best, but unless your love was your first love, then most likely they were flawed in some way.  Most flaws generally appear after those hormones let you see more clearly.  If you know that you are in a bad cycle of picking the same type of person then it is time to find some help.  You don’t have to go to a doctor, but you could ask a friend to pick someone for you.  That way you can begin to start altering that behavior and those years of anxiety, hormones and adrenaline that have imprinted on you.

Be the first to comment - What do you think?  Posted by admin - September 13, 2010 at 5:14 pm

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Breaking the habit of bad romances

Sometimes it may feel like a person is ending one bad relationship and getting into another right away. One possible reason is that finding the right partner sometimes takes time. Another reason could be that he or she doesn’t work out the relationship problems. Breaking the habit of bad romances can be done either by changing the type of partners a person dates or by working out relationship problems.

It is easier to break up with someone than to go through the process of making things work. This is one of the reasons why a person can be going through a bad love streak. Sometimes one partner may not even be aware that there is a problem. Talking about a problem is not pleasant, but it shouldn’t take a lot of time. Sometimes it is necessary for one of the two to make a compromise – usually the trickiest part of relationships. People don’t like making compromises. Unfortunately, long term romances cannot exist without putting up with someone’s faults, and trying to fix your own faults. Accepting someone for who they are is usually harder than it sounds.

Finding the right partner takes time. The reason for that is that people live very busy lives. They don’t have the time to get to know each other better before they move on to the next level. The internet provides people with the ability to get to know each other better, before they make a serious commitment. Spending time talking to someone through a voice or video conference is a lot easier after a busy day at work. Dating websites also offer their clients a lot of matches that they can choose from. One person can get to know as many matches as he or she wants before making up their mind.

A streak of bad romances usually means one of two things. A person sometimes rushes a relationship, and makes a serious commitment before getting to know his or her partner well enough. One of the two or sometimes even both partners is not willing to make compromises and work out their differences.

Be the first to comment - What do you think?  Posted by admin - September 9, 2010 at 2:19 pm

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